东成西就英文剧本

东成西就英文剧本 DONGCHENGXIJIU 旁白: 黄药师，欧阳锋，段正淳，洪七, 周伯通， who are called 东邪西毒南帝北丐中神 通， are know to everyone. Today we want to show you some absurd affairs happened in their youth.Do you know what happened,don’t laugh~! First, let’s have a look at 段王爷and his grandpa. PART 1 段王爷的爷爷:Thanks gods. One of our Duan family can enter the heaven. 段王爷:Grandpa, I don’t understand. 段王爷的爷爷:You tell me you have a dream and saw god last night, don’t you? 段王爷:Yes! 段王爷的爷爷:So that it is.When I was very very young, my grand father told me that a great grandson of mine , who is reincarnated by god, will unpuzzle the dream for me. I’m 189 years old now, I have been worried about not being able to wait so long. But I’m so glad you are here now. 段王爷:Grandpa, what does the dream mean? 段王爷的爷爷:I can’t remember, it’s long time ago. 段王爷:xia ,You kidding man. 段王爷的爷爷:You are the only one without sense of humor in the Duan family.If you want to enter the heaven, you must to find someone who calls“zhenxinren”. 段王爷:zhenxinren? 段王爷的爷爷:His first name is Huang, and there are three”six” on his breast. Only if he says he loves you three times, and you can go to the heaven. 段王爷:Oh, I really can be an angle.A YA~So my marriage with the beautiful princess zhouzhiruo of jinlun country must be cancel? 段王爷的爷爷:(兜头打) Stupid! Foolish! You are out of your mind! You shouldn’t fall in love with a girl on earth. How do you know the angels are not beautiful than your zhiruo, 众女生:(销魂)Honey„ Honey„ 段王爷的爷爷:Coming, coming. (转头再踢啊一一脚～) Stupid! 段王爷: So how can you fall in love with girls on earth? 段王爷的爷爷:Foolish! Have you ever seen an 189-year-old man who is loved by so many girls? Am I not happier than gods? Why do I have to be a god? Stupid! 段王爷:qie~You don’t want to be an angle, but I want. Ok, I will go to cancel my marriage first, and then go to find my zhenxinren。 旁白: the queen of jinlun and欧阳峰 are lover.They want to get the imperial jade seat, which is owned by the third princess zhouzhiruo. So they „„ Part 2 欧阳峰:Darling a~，now the king has been killed, so let’s clean this place, and then get married, then we can have a baby prince, isn’t that perfect? 皇后:You are so smart to think out this way. But we must go to find the third zhouzhiruo to get the imperial jade seat first. 欧阳峰:But where can we find her? 皇后:I’ve an idea. Let’s go and find guoshi。 (国师出) 宫女:Guoshi,leave the palace right now,it’s a dangerous place.Let’s go! 国师:I want to go a~but I can’t go a~the queen controled me,how can I go a~ 皇后:Guoshi，show me the crystal ball and tell me where zhouzhiruo is. 国师:You you you you want me to help you? No way～You have a day dream～ (欧阳峰上前威胁) 欧阳峰:(凶恶状)No way? 国师:No„ no„ no„ [国师拿出水晶球 ] 皇后:wow, so big! It looks like a basketball. 国师:Do you think this is a basketball? You are wrong. In fact it’s my crystal ball.[唱:半个菠萝蜜 半个菠萝蜜]She is leaving for yuexiu mountain to meet her second brother周伯通. 欧阳峰:So we must kill her before she gets there. 皇后:哥，let’s go. (三人退，三公主与宫女出。纸球扔过去。) 宫女:Who plotted against us? (欧阳峰出) 欧阳峰:It’s me, wa ta xi wa西毒欧阳峰 des。 宫女:How dare you transgress? Don’t you know you will be punished? (皇后出) 皇后:He is trying to usurp the throne. Your father has been killed by us, now it’s your turn now. Or give me the jade seat, or else„ Don’t blame for what I did. 三公主:I knew that you these bad guy !have evil intention. I’m glad I’ve practised wuliangshengong for a long time. I’ll revenge to my father! 欧阳峰:Ok. Show me yourwuliangshengong。 宫女:Princess, your shengong is not good enough. 三公主:No problem, move backward.dahaiwuliang～ (没事发生，欧阳峰与皇后抱在一起大笑。 皇后:Is that what you callwuliangshengong,What a shame aahahahahah 。。。。 三公主:dahaiwuliang～ (打中宫女，宫女倒，欧阳峰和皇后继续大笑) 欧阳峰:Rubbish! It’s my turn now! hamashengongdiyishi～(扮蛤蟆) 三公主:dahaiwuliang～ 宫女:Go away princess. 三公主:I won’t! dahaiwuliang～ 宫女:You can’t win thehamashengong～Where there is life, there is hope. Go to meet your brother inyuexiumountain , you can revenge it in the future with your brother. Go princess, go away. (拉着三公主走) 三公主:I won’t go, I won’t!(外衣被宫女扯下) 宫女:Go princess, go, quick, there is no time! (三公主终于上马，与宫女走) 欧阳峰:Go? Where can you go to? (欧阳峰与皇后想双面夹击) 皇后:qishawugongtui～ 欧阳峰:hamashengongdiershi (谁知三公主马快一步，他俩撞在一起。) 欧阳峰:Darling, are you ok darling? 皇后:Honey, you must revenge me. 欧阳峰:I will biaomei，go peacefully～(帮皇后合上眼睛) (皇后把眼睛瞪得老大) 欧阳峰:Why are you still unwilling to die? 皇后:(用力打欧阳峰的手)wei, what are you doing here? I just ask you to revenge me, I didn’t say I’m dead. 旁白: After that, they are busy finding zhiruo, so now, let’s take a look at yuexiumountian。 Part3 (于素秋与黄药师在练剑，于素秋不小心滑倒，黄药师扶着) 黄药师:aya,shimei，please take care. 于素秋:shixiong，it’s so hard to practise thismeilaiyanqujianfa, I want to give up. 黄药师:You are right, so shall we practiseqingyimianmiandao, 于素秋:qingyimianmiandao,I’m afraid that you can’t control yourself. Do you remember what you did when we were practising ganchailiehuozhang in the mountain? If I didn’t work hard to stop you, we might have done something wrong. 黄药师:Let’s make it clear, it’s me who work hard to get rid of you. 于素秋:(捂着黄药师的嘴)en。。。Shut up. Can you tell me do you really love me? 黄药师:Of course! Since I came here when I was seven, I’ve never seen any other women except you, of course I like you. 于素秋:But if you see some other women, will you still love me? 黄药师:Of course I will. (三公主出) 三公主:Excuse me, would you please tell me where is zhoubotong, 黄药师:e。。。 于素秋:(非常生气)Why do you look at him with love in your eyes? You can’t love him. He belongs to me! Even you don’t care, he still won’t like you. 三公主:(拍案而起)heng～Dame it! Why don’t you say that to him? He looks at me that way, not I look at him! (黄药师缩头) 于素秋:I don’t care it’s you who looks at him or he looks at you, he is mine, he can only do that to me.(挡到黄药师前面) If you want to look, look at me la～ 黄药师:I’ve been watching you for ten years, I won’t mind not looking at you for a while.( 走到于素秋前面) Could you tell me why you want to meet zhoubotong? 于素秋:(走到黄药师前面，向着三公主)I don’t allow you to ask, (转向黄药师)and you to answer. Ask me! 三公主:hahaha～Are you kidding? You don’t allow me to ask, but I just like to ask. I have important thing to find him, where is he? 于素秋:Not answer. (黄药师在后面伸手向右指) 三公主:o，Thanks, please.(双手摆出“请”的手势) 黄药师:Please. 于素秋:Why did you say “please ” to her? 黄药师:Nothing, she said please to me, so I said please to her. 于素秋:So why did she say ”please” to you? 黄药师:How can I know? 于素秋:Does she like you? 黄药师:Maybe. 于素秋:Then do you like her? 黄药师:No, I don’t like her, my dear xiaoshimei。 于素秋:I don’t believe you!(转身走) 黄药师:wei，where are you going? 于素秋:Go to destroy her face. 黄药师:oh。。。a,,,,～～～～～ 旁白: While at the top ofyuxiu mountian PART 4 (两人下,周伯通与 王重阳出) 王重阳:(出关)ya~~~!!!(倒地) I’m so lucky that no one saw that. I have isolated myself five years for practising xiantianshengong，today it’s my big day to finish my isolation days, no one can win me from now on. haha。Ok, now, let me tell my shidi zhoubotong by my qianlichuanyin 。 botong,ong~ong~ong~ong, now I’m a master ofxiantianshengong,ong~ong~ong~ong~，hahaha。 (周伯通出) 周伯通:shixiong，five years no see, you are so strong now, show your muscle to me! 王重阳:botong，please behave yourself. 周伯通:shixiong，Do you know how I miss you? 王重阳:botong，I know you care for me, but we are both men, we shouldn’t fall in love with each other. 周伯通:I know. 王重阳:If you know that, so what are your hands doing now? 周伯通:That’s you taught before. (王重阳笑，搂周伯通.) 洪七公:(拖长音)sister~~~~sister~~~~~, finally I can see you, hahahaha～ 于素秋:sister,,,, 洪七公:(走到于素秋前面) I’m your cousin, hongqi a ～ 于素秋:You are my cousin? Impossible! 洪七公:It’s really! If you are not my cousin, why I feel faint while seeing you? 哎呀呀，faint again. 于素秋:what do you want? 洪七公:I want to marry you.(唱)Long time no see, I love you forever . Long time no see. I love me you love me or not, I love me you love me not, I love you you love me吗, 于素秋:Stupid, foolish! Part5 (国师走在街上) 段王爷:(叫住国师)zhenxinren，zhenxinren，Please walk slower. 国师:Why do you follow me, 段王爷:zhenxinren，could you show me your breast? 国师:(巴掌)fuck u!(音乐) What a sick man. Oh, let me stay in this hotel tonight吧啦。 (国师走进客栈，宫女出) 段王爷:Lady, salute. (鞠躬) The colors of our clothes are so similar, may I take a look at your„ 宫女:oh my god～ 段王爷:Lady, take a walk, watch your step.ei。。。The world is so big, where can I find my zhenxinren,I’m a bit hungry , have a rest in this hotel. 店小二:Sir, please come in, welcome to ourshaoyang university. (皇后与欧阳峰出) 皇后:biaoge，isn’t that the third princess zhouzhiruo,And that is her second brother周伯通. But who is the other two men? 欧阳峰:Foolish! They are王重阳and his tudi黄药师。So many experts around her, we must think a good idea, not only by just fighting. 皇后:biaoge，you are so smart! 欧阳峰:Of course. 旁白: At the same time„ 于素秋:It’s so hot today, have a cup of tea in the canteen first, then go and find my师兄。 (店小二出，望着于素秋不作声) 于素秋:Why do you stare at me? 店小二:(欲上前)I。。。 于素秋:Don’t like me! I know I’m pretty and lovely, but how can a 山鸡match 凤凰? I won’t accept such a humble man as my lover, 店小二:(再欲上前)I think„ 于素秋:You can’t even have a thought! Don’t think I can’t road your mind, you think you will have chance if I stay in the canteen. No, no chance at all. (店小二转身) 于素秋:wei，why don’t you look at me? 店小二:I’m afraid you will scold me. 于素秋:Why do I have to do that to you? You have some evil intention so that you don’t look at me!But anyway, please give me a cup of tea.(刷卡) 旁白: Now, all the excepts are in shaoyang university, so what will happen ?Now just see~! (开幕布) they are having class! 旁白:Hello~my children~ Class over~ 段王爷:oh my beautiful teacher~I need your help~ 旁白:ok~what can I help you? 段王爷: may I take a look at your breast? 旁白:oh my god!!!you are so impolite!!!(生气) 段王爷:sorry,I didn’t mean... (旁白转头走) 众人:u must say sorry to the teacher! 段王爷:yes,I think so. 集体sorry sorry. 谢幕